marnik.org

Telephone surveys

Monday 25 April 2005 om 16u57

My sister walks into the room with the portable phone in her hand.

Sister: “It’s for you, I think it’s a survey kinda thing, you might wanna get rid of her”

Why don’t women understand that people on the other side of the phone can understand whatever you’re saying perfectly, even when you’re not holding the microphone to your mouth? I felt sorry for the lady already, and I felt like helping her. I guess about 90% of the people they call aren’t interested, so I was gonna make her day.

She: “Good afternoon sir”
Me: “Hi”
She: “… independant research company … market … males between 19 and 25 … Your sister (if that was your sister) told me you are in that category, is that correct?”
Me: “Yes, it is”
She: “May I have a few minutes of your time?”
Me: “Of course, why not”

I just KNOW she wasn’t prepared for that answer (which is normal when 90% tell you to get lost), it was proven by her next sentence:

*5 seconds of silence*
She: “I’m just booting up the program”
*4 seconds of silence*
She: “And filling out some information”
*5 seconds of typing*

She: “May I ask your age?”
Me: “Of course… Euh…”

I don’t know why, but I always get confused when people ask my age, I’m never sure. After all, it changes every year.

Me: “I’m turning 22 in 2 weeks, so I’m more 22 than 21 but officialy: 21″

Hehe, she was confused too now

She: “Next question sir, do you have friends or relatives working in the following business sections:
The tabacco-selling industry, reporting and/or television, …”

I don’t remember all of them, all I remember is that I didn’t know a lot of people in any of those categories, but I wanted to help her out so I did my best and found someone in the reporting and television category.

She: “I’m sorry sir, but the rules are we have to end this conversation now”

I was like “double U tee F mate?“, so I replied

Me: “May I ask why? Just out of interest”
She: “I don’t know sir, it’s the rules.”
Me: “Pssshhhh, for once you find someone that wants to help you…”
*laughter*
She: “That’s true. It’s scandalous”
*laughter*

There you go, we broke the ice (I love to make telephone-people feel good, because I know how hard it is after working in telemarketing for about 2 months). Now SHE got curious.

She: “Just out of curiousity, do you smoke?”
Me: “Not anymore”
She: “When did you quit smoking?”
Me: “Almost 2 years ago.”
She: “Well, it’s a survey for smokers and people that quit less than 6 months ago.”
“…”
She: “Goodbye”
Me: “You have a nice day”

Next time, I’ll say I’m not interested, because when I am, I’m just not good enough :p

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